I’ve had the topic of an undivided heart on my mind since I read about it in Psalms 86:11. “Teach me your way, Lord, that I may rely on your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.”
God gave me this verse when I was struggling internally with being a good Christian. I felt like I could not go one minute without saying or doing something that doesn’t reflect the goodness of God, and it was eating me up. Not only that, but I have been devoting myself to everything else; my new business, my job, my child, my friends. I was wearing myself thin and barely stopping to mutter a prayer. I felt guilt because I knew God was patiently waiting on me, calling me back.
And here’s the thing. God isn’t some dictator that demands I stay in a straight line. He knows I’ll mess up, and He loves me anyway. He wants a deep and meaningful relationship with me. So why is it so hard to accept that and make time to nurture our relationship?
Because my heart was divided. And honestly, it’s a war I’ll be fighting until my days on earth are over. But when I say divided, I mean it. On one side my heart is telling me that I’m spiraling, that I’m allowing the world to come into my heart and corrupt the goodness I’ve worked so hard to keep. That I’m leaving out what’s important. On the other side, the desires of the flesh are a dangerous temptation. Money and possessions sound so appealing that you invest yourself more and more until you stop praying. You stop going to church. You stop listening to your gospel songs in the car. You start to resent God because you don’t want to feel guilt for abandoning Him but you do. You want to do the right thing, but the wrong thing makes you feel better in the moment. Any one else feel like this?
Have you ever heard the phrase “divide and conquer”? I feel like that’s the enemies main objective. If you let him in just a little bit, he creates that division. He tempts you, he promises wealth and prosperity and all the things you want and think you need. And then it destroys you.
That is why David’s prayer is so important. We need to pray for God to keep our hearts from wandering, to keep out the division that will ultimately harm us.
In Matthew 7:13-14, Jesus said, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.”
The right choices are not always easy. Having a relationship with God takes real work. I pray for anyone reading this, if you’ve found yourself lost and your heart doesn’t seem to be in the right place, if you feel like you’re struggling with temptation and torn between good and evil, I pray over you and over your life, that you would recognize Gods abounding and endless love for you, and there is a great reward for those who preservers.