I decided to take my bible study back to the beginning, and started reading Genesis again. I love the Old Testament for many reasons, but mostly because I always learn more about God’s personality and who He is, was, and will always be.
In my last blog, I talked about feeling doubtful, and how I was struggling with really accepting that God loves me no matter the mistakes I make, as long as I keep coming back to Him. Well, today was a very off day, and those feelings of doubt I thought I was close to getting rid of, came creeping back in. (Satan, can you just not? I’m over it.)
In Genesis 12:10, we read that there was a severe famine in the land, so Abraham (at the time still called Abram) and Sarai his wife went to Egypt to stay. Abraham tells Sarai to tell the Egyptians that she is his sister, not his wife, so that he would be treated well because of her. Because Sarai was a beautiful woman, Abraham was afraid the Egyptians would kill him if they knew he was her husband. To summarize the story, instead of trusting God’s promise that he would be a blessing, he took matters into his own hands and his sin became a curse for Pharaoh and his house.
Skip to Genesis 20, where Abraham again tells the same lie of his wife being his sister to king Abimelech. It is more surprising to find this story at this point of Abraham’s life because this happened after God renewed His covenant with him, after he was circumcised, after God gave him the name Abraham, and after God was a guest in his tent. Though Abraham was deeply loved by the Lord and was a righteous man, this lie proved the point that in reality, people often fail at the same point more than once, and that failure can occur even after many many victories.
Regardless of the circumstances or discouragement weighing you down, the well of salvation runs deep, (Isaiah 12:2-3) and we can approach God for strength and wisdom.
Even in OT times we can see the struggle with sin, and that even those like Abraham faltered. In Romans 7:21-22, Paul says “So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.”
There is no doubt we as humans have sinful nature and can’t always win the battles against sin. Sometimes we are going to fail, that’s just reality. But we should always keep in mind that when Jesus died for us, he broke the power of sin, and we are no longer slaves to it, and no mistake, no failure can separate us from His love.
“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39